Category: Rant

Love and Training

2/14/2017

In honor of Valentines Day, I'm going to rant about a topic plaguing the martial arts community: LOVE.

Maybe some of you are lucky and have a supportive partner. Some of you are not lucky. I know many of you need to fight, argue, and negotiate in order to train. I've also known many martial artists who quit because their partner wouldn't let them continue training. Despite being a martial artist myself... I get it!

Classes almost always take place during the evening, which is prime date/dinner/after work time. Unlike other sports that have a season, martial arts are ongoing. For those of you training in BJJ, I can only imagine how explaining THAT must go down. Plus the martial arts are far more time consuming than an average trip to the gym. Start throwing in seminars, tournaments, extra training sessions, and even the most easy-going of partners might start getting jealous for your time.

So how do we maintain healthy relationships while still being able to train?

My first suggestion is to get your partner involved. Now this can be easier said then done. I'll have another post on just that. But there are many ways to help your partner feel involved besides getting them training with you. Invite her or him to come watch. Tell them how happy it would make you to have them there. That's a good start, and who knows? They may actually want to try it themselves.

Try merging a date into training. Invite your significant other to watch or try the class, then take them out for dinner, a movie, coffee, etc. Perhaps offer to leave early if you need to.

Look at ways to coordinate with your partner. This might look like scheduling your classes on the same nights he/she has an activity. Then you can always plan to meet before or after.

Communicate with your partner. Sometimes there might be something minor and stupid that makes your partner not want you to train. I remember one person who was a pacifist and had issues with her partner participating in something so violent. Issues like this can be cleared up with some communication and education on the martial arts.

I'm not a relationship expert or a psychologist. But in my own humble opinion, I don't think someone who truly cares about you would pressure you to quit something you love. That being said, it might take some compromise to work out your training time and relationship time. I'm very lucky to have found someone who shares my passion for martial arts, but even Brennan and I have had disagreements on training.

Happy Valentines day! <3

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The Dreaded "McDojo"

6/15/2015

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Having moments of dread is something I'm getting used to, being a new business and dojo co-owner. It doesn't matter if it's an exploding toilet or a surprise class full of brand new students: Sudden moments of fear seem to pop up on a semi-regular basis. One of those moments happened to me Sunday evening after watching an episode of Star Trek.

I suddenly found myself wondering if the only way to be successful as a business owner was to compromise and become a McDojo. One of those schools that hand out black belts like candy, that breed overconfidence and sloppy technique, one of those schools that gives Karate a bad name. I started picturing classes that resembled a Saturday afternoon at Chuck E Cheese. What if that was the only way we could make it?

Things have a way of working themselves out. We had our first kids BJJ testing and decided to test our kids the same way adults were tested. The students had to get out of a difficult position. Pass or fail, they would either succeed and break free of the hold or they would give up and fail. I was nervous about it. This was a difficult test and parents would be watching. However, the students were phenomenal. They worked incredibly hard and refused to give up, even when class technically ended. Brennan and I were incredibly proud.

It was then I realized that I didn't need to worry about becoming a McDojo. While some students may want to be placated with advanced belts without the time or work, I believe most do not. Parents and students alike are not dumb. They know quality. Deep down they know if a rank was truly earned or just handed out. While it may seem difficult at times, most students want the work that comes before an accomplishment. They recognize when a rank is truly earned and when they are being patronized. I struggle sometimes trying to find ways to make the hundred thousandth time a student has done Seisan Kata interesting and engaging. But students like the journey. They enjoy putting in the work and then seeing the end result.

There will be some students who just want the belt. They will train for a few months and inevitably leave and find a dojo that will provide them with a pat on the head and a belt around their waist. There will also be students like our kids who recently tested in BJJ. We don't need to compromise our standards, in fact we refuse to do so and it isn't even necessary.

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Traditional and Modern Dojos

5/27/2015

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Recently I've been reading a book called "In the Dojo" by Dave Lowry. The book offers an in depth look into the etiquette, rituals, and history of the Japanese Dojo. Lowry's observations combined with some conversations I've had from students who had once trained in MMA gyms got me thinking.

I've heard many martial artists proclaim themselves to have "traditional" dojos and used this to justify borderline abusive behavior. Some example include making kids do knuckle push-ups on hardwood floors, refusing water to students in a sweltering dojo, and striking students with the intent of causing physical damage. Does abuse make a dojo traditional? Especially since similar conditions can be found in MMA gyms. Some people think the kind of martial arts offered decree if a school is traditional or not. However, arts such as Muay Thai still have a rich tradition and history despite being found in many MMA gyms.

Lowry suggests that it is a subtle attitude and philosophy within the dojo that makes a dojo traditional or modern. I like this notion. A traditional dojo is based off Japanese military history. One element I partially like is the emphasis on training up everyone to their fullest potential. If we look at how a military unit trains, the army is only as strong as their weakest person. Therefore, attention is equally divided amongst the beginner, novice, and advanced students.

Modern and/or sport based dojos have different goals. Unlike traditional dojos, a gym needs just a few very talented individuals to compete and do well in tournaments. A consequence of this is that students who do not already have a strong skillset or natural ability may get neglected. The attention of the instructors is not necessarily equal.

We've tried to develop a dynamic martial arts academy. While we have arts commonly found in MMA gyms, we are undoubtedly a traditional dojo. You can train here and fight MMA or get your accredited rank in Isshin Ryu Karate. You can be a naturally gifted athlete or need reminding on your left and right. Everyone here has our respect and attention.

#BJJ #Rochestermartialarts #RochesterMMA #Rochesterkarate #Rochesterdojo #Rochestermuaythai #RochesterBJJ

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